Life, etc.

The past couple of months of my life have been driven by stress. Stress at work, stress at home. Stress at being stressed out! I'm done with this crapola. It's time to get to the bottom of it.

Stress, stress, stress

I've been doing a lot of reading lately on how to analyze your stress and combat it. While I've found the book "Stress Management for Dummies" to be useful in the technique of stress reduction, it hasn't exactly helped me figure out why I'm reacting to these "stressors" the way I am. To figure it out, I went back to my thesis research about people's self-efficacy and their attributions. Certain theories state that a person's attributions have a direct effect on their self-efficacy. (Self-efficacy: a person's belief in their ability to handle a situation) The effect on a person's self-efficacy depends upon whether an attribution is static vs dynamic (unchangeable vs changeable), internal vs. external, as well as the outcome of an event (say, a good/bad grade or a win/loss at a competition).

Why am I so stressed out?

So I took a look at the deeper cause of my reactions to perceived stressful events, and I've basically figured out that I'm stressing out because I don't perceive myself capable of handling the situations that are causing me stress. Stupid, right? Well, why do I feel that way? I've handled stressful situations in the past and come through them with flying colors. Why do I still think I can't handle these things? There must be some part of me that attributes my previous successes to some external cause. It's not because I think on my feet and am a good problem solver - no! I am placing more weight on some external factor than I am on my own capabilities. (A dear friend of mine told me a day or two ago that I need to toot my own horn more often. I hate it when other people are right. :-P)

Removing the stress

Most of the stress I've been feeling lately could have been removed if I had taken the opportunity to think about how I'm reacting to stressful situations. Well, lesson learned on that one. Clearly I have been able to get this far in life through my capability to rise above obstacles. Even just now, while I was typing the previous sentence, I originally wrote "sheer will and determination" instead of "capability." Why am I not taking my own credit for my successes? The answer to that question needs more investigation, so I'll save that for another time.

So what's the bottom line? For me, it's to learn to take credit for overcoming obstacles and solving problems in my personal and professional lives. Once I do that, I should be able to combat any stressful situations.

It's either that or move to a South American country and become a beach bum. ;-)

Triathlon Training update

Well, I kinda took the weekend off after doing so much working out last week. Not very productive toward my goals, I know. I did jog and walk on the treadmill on Saturday for a couple of miles. Last night I went back to the pool for my regularly scheduled swim. A friend met me there and we paced one another lap-for-lap. While it was great to be joined by someone, I spent a decent amount of time exercising my voice instead of swimming. Needless to say, my pace last night was less than stellar!

The good news about that is that I swam further than I had last week. I went in with a goal of doing 30 to 35 laps. I did 30 regular laps and 2 more relaxed laps (legs w/ a kickboard and a modified back stroke). The last 3 laps were a bit more tough than I expected them to be. I think by that point my arms were ready to quit. But I did it! This week's schedule is getting mixed up a bit - I'm going climbing tonight and running tommorrow.

New Goals

I've recently been inspired to set new personal goals for myself. Several friends of mine are always finding new ways to challenge themselves through physical fitness. One friend is a long distance runner - another is planning on doing the Avon Walk, a mini-triathlon, and a century all the in the same year. Watching these friends has made me realize that there are things that I want for myself that sitting on the couch most nights with a random night of rock climbing isn't going to get me. With that, I've decided to commit myself to doing a mini-triathlon next summer. I haven't worked out on a regular basis in about a year, which means that I'm desperately out of shape. Ok, ok. Not desperately out of shape. I can run a couple of miles, and evidently swim over a kilometer without too much struggle. But that's a long way off from swimming a kilometer plus running 3.4 miles plus biking 17.1 miles! Needless to say, I have a lot of training to do. :-P So from here on out, I'm going to try to chronicle my training. This way I can hold myself accountable, and I can also keep track of my accomplishments and set milestones.

Here's what I've done this week:

Monday: 20 laps in the pool (1 km): 55 mins
Tuesday: jogged 2 mi + walking: 40 mins
Wednesday: climbed 2 problems
Thursday: 25 laps in the pool (1.25 km): 45 mins

I've also set a climbing goal: I would like to comfortably climb 10.b's in the gym by the end of February. Right now I'm climbing two levels below that. We'll see how it goes!

I'm also planning on going on a backpacking trip in Rocky Mountain National Park, and I'd like to not die in the process ;-)

Mama's got a new pair of shoes!

So, after many blisters (and a bout of losing toenails a year ago in the Avon Walk) I decided it was time to go to the professionals and seek out some guidance for my sneakers. I stopped by Road Runner in Columbia to see if they could help me figure out what to fit my awkward feet. After some interesting analysis, it was determined that I have a tendency to pronate as I run. So, the sales associate (who was very nice, btw) selected these for me:


Aren't they purty? The gray area you see in the instep is extra stability to keep my foot from leaning in as I run.

Let me just say that I don't run. I don't particularly like it. Never have. I find running to be a pain (literally). I bought these running shoes so that I would feel more comfortable if I occasionally trotted during my walks. Well, to my surprise, I popped these suckers on my feet for my walk on the treadmill the other day, and found myself breaking into a run more often than I ever have. These shoes are the most comfortable thing I have ever put on my feet!

I now understand why people run. It's adrenaline-pumping. It's invigorating. And with these shoes, it's painless! I never thought I would find a day where I thought running wasn't the most horrible thing humankind ever decided to do. But, with these shoes that day has come. I'm not looking to run a marathon or anything. In fact, my short stints with running never last more than a few minutes and at 5 mph or so. Hopefully I will be able to extend my time running and increase my speed, but for this non-runner, it's a start!

Election Night

This is really one case where my nerd tendencies come out. I have been glued to the television for hours tonight following election night coverage. This includes an hour I spend on the treadmill. Imagine walking or running as you're staring at the television trying to keep your eyeballs steady and process what the pundits have to say about the election. Well, that's me!

I'm proud to say that I did my civic duty. I got up a little early this morning and got to the polls before they opened. Granted, I only got to the polls 5 minutes before they opened, but I it still counts as getting there early! It was two hours from the time I arrived and the time I completed my civic duty and left the polling place. I'm thankful that we had decent weather (not that it would have made a difference to me).

Now, I'm not usually overly patriotic. In fact, I despise jingoistic people. Every person, no matter their political affiliation, should have a healthy dose of skepticism when it comes to politicians and politics. That being said, regardless of the outcome, I can say that I contributed to a very crucial turning point in our country's history. Seeing the lines today made me very proud to call myself an American.

Unbe*Wii*vable

I have never really been a video game person. Sure, I dabbled in Mario Brothers on the Super Nintendo System when I was in elementary school (shut up - I know I'm old! ;-) ), but never really thought much about spending hours on end on a video game console. I watched other people get so engrossed that they lost hours of their time trying to get through different levels of games - and laughed. Laughed at the thought that someone could be so entertained and enthralled by something on their video screen that hours, sometimes days, could go by without them even batting an eyelash. I scoffed at the sheer cost of a single game. "How could someone pay that much for a video game?" I thought to myself. More than once. It seemed so incomprehensible to me that people would find video games so valuable that they would pay upwards of $50 for a single game.

Then IT happened. We got a Wii. All I can say is "wow." We spent a couple of hours over the past few days playing Wii sports. So much so that I woke up on Tuesday with sore shoulders and arms from throwing the controller around like an idiot. And I loved it. The Wii has completely changed my opinion of video games. I now understand how someone could become so addicted to a game that they could forego social interactions, food, sleep, and personal grooming habits all to sit in front of a video game console. Except with the Wii, there's no sitting. At least not for me. I'm on my feet jumping up and down, punching at an animated opponent, swinging an imaginary tennis racquet, and bowling a better game in Wiilife than I ever could in real life. (Bt the way, the word "Wiilife" didn't show up as wrong spelling on the spell checker!).

Next thing you know, I'm running out to my local enterainment chain to buy the WiiFit and Rock Band. That was the most amount of money I've spent in 15 minutes than I ever have in my life. I've become one of those people.

Ironically enough, when the Wii first came out I was totally against it. I thought it was ridiculous that a video game would have people simulate perfectly good activities that can be done in real life. I thought, "go outside and play tennis!" I now understand. I am horrible at tennis in real life, but on the Wii, I can actually volley. On the Wii, I can pretend like I'm freakin' Venus Williams. And no one has to know any different. ;-)

I haven't yet played the Wii enough such that I forgot what time of day it was. Or forgot to eat. I hope for my own personal sake I never get to that point. I suspect, as long as the Wii can't simulate rock climbing or bike riding, I never will. But I have a new appreciation for the benefits to my health by using the Wii (seriously, did I just type that?). Instead of sitting on my butt watching TV, I'm on my feet and using at least one of my arms actively. And hopefully, I can supplement my activity (or lack thereof) with the WiiFit and actually get some benefits of that too. I wonder if anyone has done scientific research about the health benefits of using the Wii? I'm sure they have.

Well there you have it. A video game convert. Me. I think I just saw a pig fly by my window. ;-)

Dinner

Tonight's menu: Chickpea curry and long grain rice. This is one of my favorite meals to make. It's so easy: garlic, ginger, onion, curry paste, and chick peas. Oscar has been working like crazy lately, and I really don't like spending two hours in the kitchen to eat a meal by myself. So, on nights like this one, I whip out the chickpea curry recipe. :-)

The best part is that it makes fabulous leftovers - the longer the curry sets in, the better it tastes!