Synchronicity in Finding Your Purpose

This entry is going to be a bit longer than my typical entries, so bear with me. It's needed so that I can lay out everything that's come into alignment. 

It's been a few months since I realized that I was meant to do spiritual communication work. Even longer since I knew I was sensitive to energies around me. Once I realized that I had gifts, I stepped out of my skeptical atheist frame of mind and moved toward a more open one - learning about how to keep myself energetically clean; meditating; and actively seeking opportunities to expand my skills.

Beyond understanding that I had work to do, it wasn't clear what else I was supposed to be doing with my gifts. A few weeks ago, I had an incredibly intense dream. In the dream, I noticed humans marching in a line, two at a time, surrounded by dark figures. The figures were of creatures and humanoids of all different shapes and sizes. The humans didn't notice the dark figures, but I did. I knew the figures were controlling the humans and intended on enslaving them. As I spied these figures, I started to radiate a brilliant white light. The brighter I got, the more I started to levitate in the air. I rose into the air about 20 feet in height and emitted the brightest light I'd ever seen in all directions. Like a giant illuminating disco ball. As I floated there, radiating light, something started happening to the dark figures. They started to dissolve - almost as if they were composed of minuscule smoke particles - and dissipate. The dream was so striking in its realism and string of events that it seems like I just dreamed last night. However at the time it had no meaning to me, so I made note of it and nothing more. 

    Then, in a meditation last week, my spirit guides told me something that was simultaneously humbling, intimidating, and exciting. I was told that I was to use my gifts to 'neutralize' dark energy. It's not even been six months since I realized my gifts in the first place! I've only met a handful of other mediums and spirit/energy workers since then. I asked my spirit guides "How am I supposed to go about doing this? I don't have the foggiest idea." and was told "we will put the right people in front of you to learn," and "don't worry. You're not doing this work alone. There are others doing it too." I was also told that it will be achieved by integrating universal and Earth energies in my body and radiating it back out to neutralize the darkness. That message was damn near close to the dream that I had a few weeks ago. Synchronicity.

   Then on Thursday, a medium I've recently met, let's call them Maria, reached out. Maria said she had a message to deliver, and promised to fill me in on Friday morning. Due to schedule conflicts, our conversation didn't wind up happening until later that evening. In the mean time, mid-day on Friday as I was driving to the grocery store my spirit guides popped in and said "You have to go back to Forest Haven. You need to practice." Synchronicity.

    When I spoke with Maria on Friday evening, I was told that in addition to the medium work I am meant to do, "my old career was over," and this is what I am to do for a living now. It's a pull I've felt since I started working on refining my gifts, so it wasn't surprising that I was being delivered the message via another channel. As an aside, the whole turning it into a career thing baffles me, but I trust the information on how to make that happen will be delivered to me when the time is right. Additionally, there was one more message I was given that integrated everything I've been feeling, dreaming, and experiencing to this point. I was told that I am meant to 'move energies.' Synchronicity.

    ... Move energies... All of a sudden, all of the puzzle pieces fell into place. I had often asked myself and been asked by others, "Why was I sent to Forest Haven, where dark energies abound, for my very first paranormal investigation?" Synchronicity. As someone new to all of this, it seemed a bit risky. I've spoken with paranormal investigators who have said other mediums want absolutely nothing to do with Forest Haven after only doing a remote viewing, let alone stepping foot on property. Also, *why* was I told to go to specific locations at Forest Haven for my second visit where I knew there would be dark energies? Synchronicity.

    Then today during my second meditation of the day (not typical but my first one got cut short), I was pulled into a remote viewing session of Forest Haven. I say 'pulled' because I had no intention of going there myself. I found myself watching myself stand in front of the portal in the Holly building. I could feel the energy moving through my body as I focused on using my hand and heart chakras to work over the portal. I sat there, crown chakra burning, third eye chakra pinging like a homing beacon - feeling the sensations of doing the work. Watching myself as if I was having an out of body experience, but also seeing it as if I was standing right in front of the portal. This energy work was also keeping anything that happened to be inside the portal from coming out. Synchronicity.

  I sat, watched, concentrated, felt the energy move, and listened to my spirit guides tell me what to do ("open your crown chakra wider to let in more energy." "Focus"). I was being given instructions on what to do as I was doing it. I saw the back end of the portal, which happened to protrude into the building across the street from where I was, shrink and close up. The portal in front of me slowly closed as I focused the energy there. Once it closed, I was instructed to radiate my energy outward, beyond the building, to neutralize any dark energies that remained outside the portal. I saw the two buildings that had the portal from above, and a bubble of energy over both. "Hold it there. Concentrate." Finally the energetic work had been done and I was told I could relax while the energy dissipated. Once that was complete, I cleaned my chakras and siphoned off energies that weren't mine. A ton of dark energy came off of my person. 

 

    When I finally relaxed and came out of my meditation, an hour had passed. Shocked, I reached out to Maria to see if she could tap in and detect a portal where I knew there was one. I had no idea if my meditation was a practice session or I was astrally projected to Forest Haven to actually do the work! 

    Maria asked about my experience and was told that I had indeed astrally projected. I was led by AA Uriel, who worked through me to show me how the work to close the portal would be done as an exercise. What an incredible experience that was. Maria also said that there was a portal of light elsewhere on the property, and that I had led souls through it. Interestingly, on my last visit to Forest Haven, I sensed this portal - it was an intense amount of energy - nearby in the woods. I pointed it out to Tom and he felt it too. Tom had said that it wasn't a dark portal - the nature of light emanating from the portal was different. I love it when things validate like that!

    

     

Return to Forest Haven, Part II: The Mimic

In Return to Forest Haven, Part  1, I described that I was told to visit certain buildings at Forest Haven by my spirit guides. This is the story of what I learned from visiting the Poplar building. 

    I knew that the Poplar building was dark. Every time I walked by that building I got that familiar anxious feeling, and the air surrounding the building felt heavy. One of the paranormal investigators that was with us on this trip had described his experiences in the building. As you can imagine, they weren't good. Based on the close proximity to the Holly building and the presence of the portal there, we all had the feeling that the portal extended into the Poplar building. We never made it far enough into the building to confirm or deny that feeling.

    Probably not the smartest plan, but we went to the Poplar building immediately following our attempt to go into the Holly building. I should point out that I had completely closed down my senses following my experience at Holly. This is an important factor in what came next. As we entered the building, Tom sensed a presence of a man who seemed not quite all there. We chatted for a few minutes about the man who while living seemed to have had some extreme mental difficulties before one of the paranormal investigators called us into a large room he wanted us to see. 

    Tom immediately got the sense of an intense ritual that took place in the room. On the floor were the remains of a burned mattress. The walls and ceiling were blackened with soot. Tom described the scene: At least 15 people on their knees, citing incantations and calling forth dark entities while the mattress burned in the middle of the room. I on the other hand felt completely numb as I took in the sight of this room.

    After a few minutes, I started to sense a presence in the vicinity. I walked to the other side of the room and discovered another small, enclosed room. As I approached, I shined my flashlight into the room, but did not enter. I always seem to do this; I'm not sure what good it does shining a flashlight into a room where you can't see the spirits in the first place! I engaged with this entity. Usually when interacting with spirits I get an immediate sense of the gender and relative age of a person. The identity of this thing was masked. That should have been my first clue that something was off. 

I asked the entity what they needed. Their response was 'help.' I stood there for a moment trying to discern the identity of this 'person,' when all of a sudden it dawned on me! This thing was not human. As soon as I realized what I was dealing with, I immediately called upon my spirit guides and AA Uriel (more on that in another post) to protect me, and reinforced my white energetic protection bubble. It was only a moment between me realizing that I was dealing with a mimic, me calling on my spirit guides, and reinforcing my protections that I found myself shouting "FUCK! TOM, I NEED SOME HELP OVER HERE!" The paranormal investigator that was standing next to me this whole time seemed surprised at my reaction. 

    Demons can be tricky sonofabitches. Had I not been so closed off, I likely would have immediately detected this entity for what it truly was. But I was so protective of my sensing at that moment coming straight from what we saw at the Holly building that I was lured into engaging with it before I knew what was going on. That is some dangerous, dangerous stuff. 

    Tom immediately came over and engaged his spirit guides in helping to ward off the demon. Thankfully it backed away and I didn't wind up with an attachment or a possession! Later on that evening, Tom described seeing two angels standing next to me in a defensive posture as he walked over to me to assist. 

    I wanted to go to Forest Haven to learn about my abilities and limitations, and to help wherever I could. My spirit guides told me to go to this building for a reason, but I had no idea what was in store! There's nothing like learning a lesson firsthand like that. I came extremely close to endangering myself and my loved ones. One of the things Tom told me was that before he engages with any entity, he asks his spirit guides to confirm that he's meant to interact with them before he even says hello. That is one takeaway that is burned solidly into my brain! I am so grateful to have such a gifted spiritual communicator in my life as Tom. 

    Every new engagement with the afterlife is teaching me more and more about this strange new world I've been privileged to be able to experience. I look forward to continuing to learn about my boundaries, strengths, weaknesses, and stretching my abilities. 

There's more to discuss about my latest visit to Forest Haven.. but for now I need an energetic reset. 

Return to Forest Haven, Part 1: Darkness abounds

I returned to Forest Haven last night, accompanied by my gifted friend (whom I shall call Tom from now on) and two paranormal investigators. There's a lot to share about this trip, so I'm not going to post about it chronologically this time. As I was exiting the B/W parkway, I could sense that something was different there. I could feel dark energy from a half mile away! I called Tom, who was also en route, and he said he felt the same. That was our first clue that something was quite different at FH than the last time we visited. A new medium acquaintance of mine asked the question of me, "Who the hell is new to this work and walks into paranormal investigations like it’s a walk in the park?" Well, let me tell you that compared to last night, my first visit to FH absolutely was a walk in the park! 

    That morning, I had asked my spirit guides for guidance on what I should do/where I should go once I got to the property. The answer I received kind of stunned me. I was told I should go to three specific buildings. I already knew based on my last visit plus some remote viewing that the buildings in question had portals in them. I was kind of shocked to hear the answer I was being given, but there was no doubt that Tom and I were meant to go to those specific buildings on that specific night. So we set out to investigate those buildings during our visit.

    I wrote about the Holly building in one of my earlier blog entries. Holly, the Chapel, and Poplar were the three buildings identified by my spirit guides that we were to visit. As we made our way toward Holly, Tom and I felt the distinct absence of Earth-bound spirits hanging around. Unlike last time where we could sense spirits freely roaming the streets keeping a watch on us, everything felt eerily quiet. 

    Previously, I didn't feel threatened by being in the building or even in the same room as the portal in the Holly building. Last night was a completely different experience! As we approached the Holly building, the hair on the back of my neck started to stand up. I got that heavy, anxious feeling I get when I sense the presence of something dark. The air felt as thick as soup. I stopped about 30 yards from the building and just stared. 

    I immediately got the 'sight' of at least half a dozen dark entities hanging out throughout the building. They were powerful beings. Tom had stopped even before I did. I called to one of our paranormal investigator friends for him to stop where he was. He was about 10 yards from the front door before I stopped him. I shudder to think what could have happened to him if he actually entered that building. I looked at Tom and we both knew there was no way we were going in that building!

    We talked about it for a few minutes. Tom can see into the spirit realm, and he described the entities that were in the building as very large. Later Tom would tell me that he has never encountered a situation where he just would not walk into a building. One of the paranormal investigators asked me if I could call on my spirit guides to clear the building so we could enter. Absolutely not. I explained that If I felt compelled to go into the building to help an Earth-bound spirit, then and only then would I call upon my guides for help. In this case, whatever was lurking in Holly was having a field day and there was no purpose for me being in that building. 

    I don't know what those things were, or why they were there this time vs the last time we paid a visit to the property. It was a completely surreal experience. I am getting chills just recalling the sensations I had standing outside that building. After some reflection, the reason my spirit guides sent me to that building became clear. They wanted me to sense that kind of energy, to understand that there are some things that aren't to be messed with. I'd learn the reason for being asked to visit the Poplar building in a similar way...

My first trip to Forest Haven (part 1 of ?)

 

The Administration Building at Forest Haven. Image Courtesy Abandoned America.

There is so much to tell from my experience at Forest Haven that I feel like it's too much to put in one post. 

Part of my approach to developing my medium abilities is to reach out to like minded communities on social media. It's through one of these communities that I connected with a paranormal investigator, who offered to show me around Forest Haven. Forest Haven is an abandoned asylum not too far from me. It operated from 1921 to 1991, and had some of the most horrific cases of abuse and mistreatment of the patients in the entire state of Maryland, if not the country. 

    I invited a friend who is a much more experienced spiritual communicator than me, which they gladly accepted. Both of us sensed the presence of a dark entity in the place in some pre-visit meditations. In addition to learning about some of the spirits who remain on site, I got a sense there was a dark energy portal somewhere in the woods on the property. This made me nervous, because I already knew that I was sensitive to the presence of ghosts. I couldn't discern whether my anxiety was a result of a benign ghost presence vs the presence of dark forces/energies. As soon as we stepped onto the property, my friend and I could sense that we were surrounded by entities. I could feel the presence of at least one ghost as it approached me - my spine immediately began tingling. We conducted a protection prayer, and as soon as it was finished we could feel the pressure back off.  

    Our paranormal investigator guide first had us walk to the furthest building we were going to tour. As we walked past one of the buildings, I got a whiff of perfume. I could sense spirits inside the buildings watching us as we walked by. We turned a corner, and I immediately sensed a spirit watching us. As soon as he left, I said out loud "he went left." My counterpart said at the same time, "he went that way," directed his arm in the same direction, and informed us that the spirit was going to inform the others of our arrival. It felt good to be validated by another who is sensitive to the spirit world. 

    At one point, I walked into a HUGE wall of dark energy. This energy pushed me back a few steps and gave me an overwhelming sense of sadness. It was so strong that I started crying. My counterpart asked spirits for assistance in pushing back the energy so we could proceed. We continued a bit further. This trip was the first time I entered a building with ghosts present since my awakening. I was curious and a bit apprehensive about what I would encounter. The first building we entered was Hemlock. It was a 'prison' building where the most difficult patients were kept. (Spoiler alert, if you want to know what happened that I'm going to describe below, you can watch the video!).

    Our guide led us down a central corridor to begin our exploration of the building. The floor was littered with artifacts of times gone by in the facility. A paper with cleaning staff names written on it in beautiful penmanship caught my eye. It was from 1989. As we reached the end of the hallway, we turned left. Flashlights in hand, we looked in rooms and I could sense the remnant energies of the people who once lived and worked in the facility. My two companions were conversing about something that completely missed me, because I got the feeling that I was compelled to move in a certain direction. I walked away from them and toward a small room at the end of a side hallway (you can see me take off at the beginning in the video linked above).

    I approached the room to which I felt called, and I could sense a presence there. As I tried to step into the room, I was met with resistance. The ghost there didn't want me to come into the room. I knew he was there and I had felt called there but once there it was clear that I wasn't welcome. Turns out there was a reason for it. My friend informed me that I reminded Eddie (the ghost's name) of a nurse that once worked at the facility. No wonder he didn't want me intruding on his space! What happened next was one of the most incredible things I have ever witnessed. I don't think that my words can do it justice, so I suggest you watch the video to find out what happened! I will try to describe it if you aren't inclined to watch, but know that it will pale to witnessing the actual events as they unfolded.

    My counterpart is extremely gifted in spirit communication. They are able to not only see into the spirit world, but also can assist Earth-bound spirits in crossing over into the spirit realm. These are skills I endeavor to learn as I expand my abilities. Eddie the spirit didn't have a lot to say. Evidently he was heavily drugged (as were most of the patients at FH) and slowly losing his mind. Eddie didn't know why he was still Earth-bound. When he was asked if he wanted help transitioning, he said yes. It felt safe to assist him - he wasn't one of the spirits being kept at the facility by a ghost dabbling in dark energy (more on that in another post).

    My friend called upon his father - in his life he was another gifted communicator who also helped Earth-bound spirits cross - to help Eddie. I really wish I could have 'seen' and heard what occurred next, but I could sense it. My friend's father spoke with Eddie for a bit, reassuring him that he would be safe and loved on the other side. Then he opened a portal. I was immediately hit with a wave of energy. Eddie's family came through and spoke with him. When all were ready, they walked through the portal together. It was at that moment that I was again hit with another wave of energy. As soon as they walked through, the energy in the room changed dramatically.

    I'm so incredibly glad that I was able to witness this crossing over. Receiving messages from spirits and sensing ghosts is one thing, but to 'see' the moment when one crosses over to the other for the first time is something I will never forget! I look forward to many more occasions where I cannot only witness but also have the skills to let these lost souls find their way home.

    There is so much more to share about my experience in Forest Haven, so stay tuned!