Synchronicity in Finding Your Purpose

This entry is going to be a bit longer than my typical entries, so bear with me. It's needed so that I can lay out everything that's come into alignment. 

It's been a few months since I realized that I was meant to do spiritual communication work. Even longer since I knew I was sensitive to energies around me. Once I realized that I had gifts, I stepped out of my skeptical atheist frame of mind and moved toward a more open one - learning about how to keep myself energetically clean; meditating; and actively seeking opportunities to expand my skills.

Beyond understanding that I had work to do, it wasn't clear what else I was supposed to be doing with my gifts. A few weeks ago, I had an incredibly intense dream. In the dream, I noticed humans marching in a line, two at a time, surrounded by dark figures. The figures were of creatures and humanoids of all different shapes and sizes. The humans didn't notice the dark figures, but I did. I knew the figures were controlling the humans and intended on enslaving them. As I spied these figures, I started to radiate a brilliant white light. The brighter I got, the more I started to levitate in the air. I rose into the air about 20 feet in height and emitted the brightest light I'd ever seen in all directions. Like a giant illuminating disco ball. As I floated there, radiating light, something started happening to the dark figures. They started to dissolve - almost as if they were composed of minuscule smoke particles - and dissipate. The dream was so striking in its realism and string of events that it seems like I just dreamed last night. However at the time it had no meaning to me, so I made note of it and nothing more. 

    Then, in a meditation last week, my spirit guides told me something that was simultaneously humbling, intimidating, and exciting. I was told that I was to use my gifts to 'neutralize' dark energy. It's not even been six months since I realized my gifts in the first place! I've only met a handful of other mediums and spirit/energy workers since then. I asked my spirit guides "How am I supposed to go about doing this? I don't have the foggiest idea." and was told "we will put the right people in front of you to learn," and "don't worry. You're not doing this work alone. There are others doing it too." I was also told that it will be achieved by integrating universal and Earth energies in my body and radiating it back out to neutralize the darkness. That message was damn near close to the dream that I had a few weeks ago. Synchronicity.

   Then on Thursday, a medium I've recently met, let's call them Maria, reached out. Maria said she had a message to deliver, and promised to fill me in on Friday morning. Due to schedule conflicts, our conversation didn't wind up happening until later that evening. In the mean time, mid-day on Friday as I was driving to the grocery store my spirit guides popped in and said "You have to go back to Forest Haven. You need to practice." Synchronicity.

    When I spoke with Maria on Friday evening, I was told that in addition to the medium work I am meant to do, "my old career was over," and this is what I am to do for a living now. It's a pull I've felt since I started working on refining my gifts, so it wasn't surprising that I was being delivered the message via another channel. As an aside, the whole turning it into a career thing baffles me, but I trust the information on how to make that happen will be delivered to me when the time is right. Additionally, there was one more message I was given that integrated everything I've been feeling, dreaming, and experiencing to this point. I was told that I am meant to 'move energies.' Synchronicity.

    ... Move energies... All of a sudden, all of the puzzle pieces fell into place. I had often asked myself and been asked by others, "Why was I sent to Forest Haven, where dark energies abound, for my very first paranormal investigation?" Synchronicity. As someone new to all of this, it seemed a bit risky. I've spoken with paranormal investigators who have said other mediums want absolutely nothing to do with Forest Haven after only doing a remote viewing, let alone stepping foot on property. Also, *why* was I told to go to specific locations at Forest Haven for my second visit where I knew there would be dark energies? Synchronicity.

    Then today during my second meditation of the day (not typical but my first one got cut short), I was pulled into a remote viewing session of Forest Haven. I say 'pulled' because I had no intention of going there myself. I found myself watching myself stand in front of the portal in the Holly building. I could feel the energy moving through my body as I focused on using my hand and heart chakras to work over the portal. I sat there, crown chakra burning, third eye chakra pinging like a homing beacon - feeling the sensations of doing the work. Watching myself as if I was having an out of body experience, but also seeing it as if I was standing right in front of the portal. This energy work was also keeping anything that happened to be inside the portal from coming out. Synchronicity.

  I sat, watched, concentrated, felt the energy move, and listened to my spirit guides tell me what to do ("open your crown chakra wider to let in more energy." "Focus"). I was being given instructions on what to do as I was doing it. I saw the back end of the portal, which happened to protrude into the building across the street from where I was, shrink and close up. The portal in front of me slowly closed as I focused the energy there. Once it closed, I was instructed to radiate my energy outward, beyond the building, to neutralize any dark energies that remained outside the portal. I saw the two buildings that had the portal from above, and a bubble of energy over both. "Hold it there. Concentrate." Finally the energetic work had been done and I was told I could relax while the energy dissipated. Once that was complete, I cleaned my chakras and siphoned off energies that weren't mine. A ton of dark energy came off of my person. 

 

    When I finally relaxed and came out of my meditation, an hour had passed. Shocked, I reached out to Maria to see if she could tap in and detect a portal where I knew there was one. I had no idea if my meditation was a practice session or I was astrally projected to Forest Haven to actually do the work! 

    Maria asked about my experience and was told that I had indeed astrally projected. I was led by AA Uriel, who worked through me to show me how the work to close the portal would be done as an exercise. What an incredible experience that was. Maria also said that there was a portal of light elsewhere on the property, and that I had led souls through it. Interestingly, on my last visit to Forest Haven, I sensed this portal - it was an intense amount of energy - nearby in the woods. I pointed it out to Tom and he felt it too. Tom had said that it wasn't a dark portal - the nature of light emanating from the portal was different. I love it when things validate like that!

    

     

The "Color" of Energy

Ok, bear with me for a moment. We all know that the electromagnetic spectrum comes in orders of magnitude of wavelengths (hello scientist in me coming out - good to see you old friend!). And we also have all grown up with the familiarity of ROYGBIV: the acronym for the colors of the visible light spectrum. Red, Orange, Yellow, Green, Blue, Indigo, Violet for those whom might be unfamiliar. We've seen it in action whenever we are fortunate enough to spy a rainbow after a rainstorm or scattered in the spray of a hose. So let's add to that the familiar (at least in the US) color palate of the GenX youth: The Crayola 64 pack. These were our exposures to color early on in our lives before we grew into boring adults with muted pastels and washed out grays. For those of us with clairvoyance, energies have colors too!

    Before I started this journey, I knew I was sensitive to energies. I've had experiences throughout my life that defied explanation. From intuitively "knowing" about haunted places to having out of body experiences and witnessing a spiritual attachment, there have always been things that I saw and felt that were 'true' even if I couldn't explain them. Since I started this journey and have been studiously working to understand my role in the greater cosmic play, I have been working with energies. One of the books I picked up early in my discovery was "Basic Psychic Development" by John Friedlander and Gloria Hemsher. In it, the book describes working with your chakras and how to clear energies that aren't yours. 

    I have always been a person who works well in 3D visualizations. There's a reason I became a structural geologist. The 3D rendering of rock structures always came easily to me. An (completely misogynistic) early mentor in my college years told me I had "the GRE Scores of a man: high in logic, high in math, and low on verbal." (Don't get me started). Because of this ability of mine, the task of visualizing the exercises in this book took very little of my brain power. I was able to focus my thoughts on the energies that were mine and those that weren't. I could visualize siphoning off energies that didn't belong to me to return them to the Earth, that would then return them to those to whom they belonged if warranted. As others' energies were siphoned off of me, they came out in a myriad of colors. 

The most common energy colors that I perceive coming off of me are yellow, blue, and green. This isn't surprising. Most people who work in this realm recognize that these colors are associated with the solar plexus, throat, and heart chakras. They have to do with free will, voice, and the heart. Interestingly enough, the "roses" I visualize are often in these colors as well. Occasionally I'll get a red or pink rose indicating the root chakra. But more often than not the color of the rose I'm dealing with is related to where my own energetic blocks are forming. 

 

Hubble image of the Eagle Nebula.
Image Courtesy NASA

    Once in a while I will get colors of energy that stand out, either due to their rarity or their intensity. After I visited a venue that featured like-minded spiritual people, I siphoned off the most vivid colors I had ever seen. It was at that same venue that I encountered a medium who would later question how I was able to perform as a medium as I have. I saw bright, vivid green and the most intense purple that had ever crossed my path. I hypothesize that those of us who are gifted with the ability to see and communicate with the spirit world have more vivid auras than those who don't. 

    After the first occasion of remote viewing into Forest Haven, I siphoned off what I termed a "metric shit-ton" of black energy. Given what I sensed there and have since experienced first hand, I am not all that surprised. White energy makes a rare appearance. I think I've only seen it once in my visualizations.  

    This week, I experienced a new color: Brown. I won't get into what that meant to me and from whom it came, so I'll just leave it at this. When I asked AI to interpret what it meant, it was eerily accurate. The description of the meaning of brown energy is 100% aligned with my lived experience. I hope that remains the one and only time I have to siphon off brown energy. It was a bit triggering for me.

    As I delve deeper and deeper into this spiritual experience, I become increasingly aware of how much I still have to learn. I'm grateful that I was chosen to be on this path. It's incredibly challenging at times, but also really rewarding. I also have an increasing awareness over everything that I have overcome to be here. 

    

Feeling other people's pain

If you've never read the Hitchhiker's Guide To The Galaxy, I highly recommend it. Terry Pratchett has a way with words like no other. I was reminded today of an element in the book that is just a minor part, but has so much meaning when you think about it. In the book, Trillian finds a 'point of view' gun and uses it to hit the President of the Galaxy with her thoughts. He immediately felt what she was feeling, and was able to understand why she was acting the way she was. I'm struck by how poignant this instrument is. Imagine being able to point and shoot at someone and they immediately understand your feelings on a deep, deep level. How much miscommunication and pain do we as humans go through trying to get someone else to understand us? 

    Today during meditation I learned that being an empath and medium is a lot like having access to a reverse point of view gun. I was asked to do a reading for a friend of a friend. Not really knowing this person, I agreed and asked my spirit guides for some information. Among the pieces of info I received, I was hit with this overwhelming sense of heartache. I know from conversations with my friend that the person I was asked to read for has had their fair share of grief in their life, though I don't really know the circumstances surrounding the cause. The grief I felt was deep and heavy. My spirit guides were showing me exactly how this person feels. I felt a deep ache in my chest, I immediately began to weep. I personally have never experienced grief so deep in my life, but even though I had no reference, I knew exactly what it was I was feeling. 

    As an empath, I have a lot of experience absorbing others' emotions. But that is sort of like wearing a new skin or a new piece of clothing. You can feel it on the outside, but you know it's not yours and you can take it off at any time. I briefly felt this deep when I walked into a large, dark entity in one of my visits to Forest Haven. During today's meditation, I was feeling the grief, pain, and anguish as if it were my own. When I recovered, I asked my spirit guides if there was anything else I should see. I was told that I had enough for today. I think this experience is like training wheels for me since I'm so new at all of this. My guides are showing me my potential, but aren't overwhelming me with too much too fast. 

    I am so grateful that my gifts allow me access to other people's feelings in this way. It gives me a deep awareness of the humanity of us all. Imagine how much better off we would be as a race of beings if we all had the capability of accessing others' emotions and feelings. I'm convinced that so much of what we're experiencing right now as a society can be directly attributed to a lack of empathy. 

Astral Projection during Meditation

Y'all. I'm not going to lie. My life is unusual these days. Ever since I was contacted by a spirit, I have established a spiritual practice to ensure that I remain open to the gifts I've been given. On a daily basis I meditate, sense and clear my chakras, practice gratitude, and ask my spirit guides for guidance. But the strangest of all things happened to me today in meditation - astral projection. 

    Only once before in my life do I remember feeling the essence of my soul leave my body. I was a kid and had just visited Edgar Cayce's museum. Whatever practice I had conducted either at the museum or afterward left me open to sense this sort of projection. Some say that it happens on a nightly basis, but we don't remember it when we awaken. The experience I had as a kid occurred in my sleep. I awoke in the middle of the night to find myself hovering over my body. I also sensed the duality of my spirit: both masculine and feminine. 

    Today's experience was a little different - I was fully awake and aware of what was going on. In my daily meditation, I often experience the sensation of my conscious mind 'lifting,' but it never actually reached a point where it existed outside of my body. Well today it did. I was asking my spirit guides to help me work through my fear of instability. I don't have a job replacement yet and I worry on a daily basis about this. I started to cry. I realized the insecurity I was feeling was deeper than just 'I need a job.' It actually stemmed from a deep seated belief that I wasn't enough. As the tears started flowing, my consciousness literally floated out of my brain and expanded outside of my body. I could sense my body and feel the tears running down my cheeks, but everything felt small. Like I was detached from what was occurring inside my body. It was a little unsettling. I worried that I wasn't going to be able to 'get back in' to my body, and then what? But as I watched, the worry subsided and I just observed. My body shed the stress of the worry that I carry, and my consciousness watched it happen. As I sat there, my consciousness was met with an overwhelming sense of comfort. A full knowing that it will all work out. 

    I suppose this was my spirit guides' way of showing me that I was protected. The niggling thoughts about job security are still in my thinking mind, but I also have this awareness now that whatever it looks like, I will be supported. My logical brain knows that I'm capable of whatever I put my mind to. Goodness knows I've been through enough in my life that I've proven to myself time and time again that I can handle whatever comes my way. I thought that I had processed enough of my trauma that I had thoroughly and fundamentally squashed any doubts about that. Looks like I may have a bit more work to do there. 

    Now that I have experienced astral projection in my meditative practice, I fully expect that it will be a regular occurrence. I look forward to discovering more about myself through these experiences.